Dear Beautiful Black Girl
Junior year of high school playing around in my friend basement. We all took one of the boys hat and had a photoshoot…cuz duh!!
I could not rest after hearing the news of what happen to Ma’Khia Bryant. It felt different than any other police killing that I had ever learned about. I started writing an apology letter to her but realized so many beautiful black girls needed a similar apology. So this is my apology to you, she, me, we.
Beautiful Black Girl,
I am sorry the truth is there was no right choice for you to make.
I am sorry that as soon as I heard them say the 911 call indicated a knife was present and no identifying information that the case was closed.
I am sorry that when they rushed to show the bodycam footage that the narrative circulating would be negative.
I am sorry that you were scared, angry, hurt, frustrated, confused and lonely in your head and heart every moment leading up to your last breath.
I am sorry you could not move to a new state to start a new job and got murdered with no explanation.
I am sorry your child had to watch your execution.
I am sorry you could not rest in your own bed.
I am sorry you got turned around on those confusing winding roads in D.C.
I am sorry you couldn't trust male BLM protestors.
I am sorry you called “officer friendly” to save you as a youth in care but he saw you as target practice.
I am sorry that when you are a big black girl you become a target for everyone around you.
I am sorry that adult women size you up like you’ve done something to them other than exist.
I am sorry they give you nasty looks and make you feel horrible about not fitting into their acceptable box of innocence.
I am sorry they call you “fast” because other people are infatuated with you.
I am sorry your peers (boys & girls) treat you like you are a science experiment, always touching you and commenting on your body WITHOUT PERMISSION.
I am sorry teachers tell you “ignore them you should know better” or “you too big for that.” or that “be the example” bs.
I am sorry that adults constantly barrade you about progressing in areas they have yet to develop.
I am sorry black men treat you like you are ripe and ready for the picking.
I am sorry they use and abuse you and convince themselves you either wanted it or deserved it.
I am sorry fathers leave you unprotected.
I am sorry mothers get left exhausted and take it out on you.
I am sorry the system failed you.
I am sorry you were born into a world that shames women for having babies and aborting babies which leaves us with innocent beautiful little lives without people to care for them.
I am sorry that if you experience the foster care system as a child/youth that you have already been institutionalized as a criminal.
I am sorry that all your life you’ve had to fight.
I am sorry that your intersectionality is what makes you the GOAT but it is what will get you shot down like a BITCH in the street.
I am sorry they ignore the resilience it takes to maintain your sanity in this world as a black girl.
Love,
A Beautiful Black Girl
